| Articles
Cellular Memory Healing is a very personal healing practice that I have intensively experienced, for the past five yearrs.
My teacher's name is Marcus Daniels. Here is an article that he wrote on "Advanced States of Healing".
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Advanced States of Healing By Marcus Daniels
(This article is a discussion of the theories and principles of advanced states of healing and how to access them.)
Over the past 15 years, I have treated a variety of clients. A brief case study of two of them illustrates the process of advanced states of healing. Three years ago, a woman came to me who had been trying for a year to get pregnant without success. In the first session, massage and energy work was done around her pubic bone and inner pelvis. In the second session, while we were talking, I saw in her energy field a word pattern connected to an old memory: "Mommy doesn't love me because I'm a bad girl."
I asked her if she felt safe enough to try an experiment. She agreed. She was instructed to place her hand on her jeans, over her vagina. In one ear I whispered, "You're a good girl", and then in her other ear, "You're a bad girl." This continued for 20 minutes, after which she began to have a release, expressing her anger and sadness. She was reexperiencing a time when her mother had berated her for having sex at too young an age. We finished the session. That week she became pregnant, and nine months later she gave birth. The emotion of guilt had been blocking her from becoming pregnant. As she relived the experience, she released the guilt, and thus the blockage.
During a class session, a man began to experience physical pain. He was holding onto fear and resistance. As he became willing to love the pain and the resistance, he felt like his head was going to explode. As the session progressed, he began to have the memory of his actual birth, and the experience of being a forceps delivery. At this exact moment, the forceps marks appeared on his skull. (This is physical imprinting of a repressed memory). Once this memory was fully realized, he immediately moved into an experience from high school. He was playing baseball, slid into third base, and broke his ankle. As he relived the memory with full feeling, he actually experienced the shock and numbness of the broken bone. His ankle then recracked into a new position within this session, releasing the trauma and gaining greater mobility of the joint. This case illustrates how the activation of one suppressed memory can trigger off many others.
Let's begin by stating the obvious. We live in a physical body, and so it is the body that is the main vehicle or key to accessing all levels of healing. There are many other wonderful vehicles with which to heal, but until they are integrated with the body, they will not give rise to our greatest potential as human beings. Our body is a library that stores all the records of our relationship with everything: emotions, thought patterns, memories, energy Systems etc. The phrase coined for this library of records is Cellular Memory (C.M.).
The most important relationship that can he accessed through CM is one's connection to the spirit. As we make a physical connection with spirit, we come in contact with the most powerful healing force of all - unconditional love. This connection happens by feeling. Inside our being is the full spectrum of emotions, from grief and anger, to boredom to joy - from numb unconsciousness to the enthusiasm of love.
As life experiences give rise to an emotional state, a very interesting process occurs. We are actually given the choice to feel or not to feel, and how much to feel as well. The more we choose to feel, whatever the emotion is, the more we are actually feeling with love. This is because universal law dictates we cannot feel anything without first feeling love. So as one resists the feeling of the particular emotion that is present, one is also resisting love, and moving into unconsciousness. This resistance causes a person to shut down the heart and body, which are the sensory organs for feeling, and move into the intellectual/rational being.
Once in the intellect, we are no longer purely feeling. We only think we are feeling. This is where all our emotions get looped into thought patterns. A traumatic story can be retold a hundred times, with the teller trying to work through the pain and reaction, but not until this experience is truly felt in the present moment can there be true healing and freedom from the negative pattern.
What does being in the moment mean? As we go through a moment of experience in total awareness, we are allowing whatever will be to exist. If we are looking for something to happen, or trying to make something happen, we are not in the moment. If in the moment, for example, angels arise and we attach judgment to this, we have knocked ourselves out of the moment. Fear will also shut us out of being in the moment. Being able to embrace any feeling, without fear, judgment or guilt, will open the gate to both healing and the growth of consciousness.
Let us explore the dynamics of fear and its block to healing and consciousness. Fear is a state of mind that exists when we cannot feel our love. Fear exists in every suppression of an emotion, memory and thought pattern. In order to feel an old anger pattern; we must embrace the fear of feeling angry. Once we open ourselves to feel this fear, it means that unconditional love is present, and healing is activated.
By activating the suppressed feelings, memories and thought patterns that are locked in the unconscious mind and body, we are bringing the unconscious to conscious-ness. Through the process of truly feeling in the moment, we are becoming conscious. The healing equation can be said to be summarized as: consciousness equals feeling, and feeling equals love. The highest state of consciousness is the highest state of feeling pure, unconditional love. As consciousness grows, the reactive patterns that are held in the physical body diffuse. The continuing progression of reactive patterning becomes disease. Therefore, in the highest state of consciousness, disease cannot exist.
As we activate higher states of healing, our bodies will want to go unconscious. This unconsciousness can take the form of physical and mental numbness or actually going asleep. At this point, we must take charge and demand from ourselves to stay in the present. By embracing our unconscious patterns and staying committed to our love/feeling process, all suppressed feelings, memories and thought patterns will come to the surface.
With the surfacing of these feelings in the therapeutic process often comes a sense of physical heat. This heat melts the holding patterns in both the physical and emotional bodies. There is a law of healing, which states that as tension goes through a block, it produces heat. This is the heat of unconditional love dissolving the blocks that hold it back.
PAST AND FUTURE FEAR
The only reason the past can repeat itself is because there is a part of its experience that has not been fully felt - without reaction or judgment. As we work through past traumas and lovingly embrace the feelings that arise in the present experience, we can forgive ourselves and those involved with the experience. This full feeling memory, both psychically and physiologically, will open the channel to lose the reactive energy charge. When this charge becomes neutral, this part of life can be fully assimilated, bringing us back into one being.
The anticipation of the future brings its own unique set of circumstances. The fear of the future inhibits an individual's ability to let go and enter an advanced healing state. There are several core fears, or sub fears, that are encoded into our total make-up as human beings. One is the fear of death. This may also be understood as a death of the ego and our identity with the world. Even though an individual may not have a conscious thought about fearing death, this fear exists as a deep feeling, or conditioning pattern. The activation of this dying process in therapy in itself is a type of rite of passage to feel our spiritual/divine presence.
Some people have a fear of becoming crazy when they start to let go This fear is worse than the fear of dying, because it means we are stuck in limbo, unable to escape the craziness even through death. The third most common sub fear is the fear of exploding into a violent rage - even of murdering - because the dark side of our personality no longer has boundaries.
Once we can move into the many spaces of fear with safety and love, we can surrender to the inner healing power of the divine. As we expand into the light, we also expand into the darkness. The more light there is, the more darkness there is. Any fear is ultimately the fear of letting go into these many aspects of oneself. This very powerful, and multi-layered, mechanism called fear resides in every pain and contraction of the body.
When an individual becomes stuck in his/her pain, any healing technique that uses awareness touch will activate the love and safety necessary to surrender deeper. Within healing modalities, to touch is to love. This process will also activate the surfacing of any suppressed experience, and so again we have the opportunity to move into a higher state of healing.
As we live in the physical body, it is the body itself that is the key to all levels of healing. By working with the physical body, we can access every process necessary to bring about advanced states of healing.
Marcus Daniels is Director of the Lung Ta Institute in Bloomfield, New Jersey. He is a specialist in body therapies and cell memory activation.
Over the last 15 years, Marcus Daniels has been teaching and practicing this level of healing. His own educational background includes connective tissue therapy, polarity therapy, acupuncture, body electronics, cellular memory therapy, and many years of retreat and study with the Tibetan Buddhists and other spiritual lineages.
Marcus teaches workshops and bodywork in New Jersey and Los Angeles.
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My Articles
The following articles are informative essays that I wrote as a result of what I learned from my experiences during classes on "Cellular Memory Healing" with my teacher Marcus Daniels.
The Bliss of Loving
Sensual & Loving Awareness for Couples who want to learn how to Share in a Healing & Intimate Union.
Tantra teaches how to bring spirit into matter, meaning how to manifest divine essence in the density of the physical body. When this happens, there is a line up with ones own divine essence that can be felt within the body. For this to occur, a person has to be comfortable being aware of all aspects of their true feelings, while at the same time slowing down inside to feel and receive them. It is from being able to stay present and conscious in each moment while continuing to feel in our bodies, which allows our divine spirit and wisdom to manifest in our physical body.
When it comes to love making techniques like g-spot massage and prolonging ejaculation, it is important once again to allow oneself to be very present in the moment while tuning in to feelings and really slowing down to be aware of all aspects of ones experience. Of course all of this takes time to learn to integrate and know as ones own second nature. Yet by beginning to learn some basic Tantric realizations, one can be guided towards having a healing experience with more present and conscious awareness.
When practicing Tantra techniques with a partner, it is most important to be able to communicate with them on a heart level. To do this requires that one learn how to be focused on a heart & love connection with their partner, while feeling at ease to share any feelings that come up during such intimate times. When one feels completely open to share how they really feel with their lover, then the sexual act of uniting together is an incredible experience.
To actually connect with another person, and be naked emotionally, heals each person, if they can surrender to such intimacy even when fears exist. Of course some fears may always exist, since as human beings, we will always be given an opportunity to feel any and all of our human feelings. To experience the sacredness of sharing love intimately, we are required to share all that we are with each other. If instead we choose to wear a mask, and keep certain aspects of ourselves hidden, we do not receive the full benefits that loving each other can offer.
Once we learn a few simple universal truths, opening up to
allow ourselves to feel more love becomes much easier, and the workings of true love become more transparent and obvious. We are all here to help and guide each other as we continue to evolve our souls along the path of life. To really be able to help each other requires that we are able to communicate what is in our hearts with each other. That is why we need to learn the kind of things that will show us how to heal with each other, and how to recognize the fears and limitations that keep us stuck in old habitual patterns that do not serve our highest desires.
It takes courage to look inside of ourselves and be aware of all of the aspects that we often avoid just for safety. After a while though the safety becomes a prison and rather than ignore the walls, it is best to break through them to reach a new freedom and a new happiness. Looking at things honestly is the best way to know what one really wants to create in their life. If true bliss joyful pleasure is what one wants, then one has to take the initiative to receive it!
When it comes to sensuality and sexuality, it is important to be aware of your true feelings, because the kind of karmic residue that is the easiest to incur is the karmic residue that results when people are sexual with each other. If you are not planning on being truly naked with someone during a sexual union, then you will be adding to karmic debts that will have to be accounted for at some time.
Thus being completely honest and emotionally naked with your partner will be of utmost importance. Since your partner is a big part of your outer world, you will want to be aware of what it is that you are creating with this person. Especially when you are sharing something as intimate as sexual union with each other.
When you do learn how to be really present and conscious and in your truth, you will find that making love is one of life's biggest challenges, because the act of sex can easily take you away from feeling your feelings and being present with your lover. Thus when you are truly conscious in your love making, and your intent is to experience union with your lover, you have the potential to experience blissful orgasms that are unique, rather than habitual or static.
It is a challenge to change a pattern of having orgasms in a habitual way that you have become accustomed to. Often couples rush through their sensual moments and end up sharing a sexual experience, when they could choose to actualize feeling a blissfully loving union. The difference is often very subtle and requires continued vigilance and guidance to be capable of really discerning when each other's presence is natural or a display.
The subtleties of knowing your true presence takes a while to learn. It really takes hours of practice to become more conscious of what is a natural expression and what is shared because of some agenda or a display. Thus learning how to be authentic takes practice for everyone, since we all have a certain amount of conditioning from societies' general unspoken rules of proper or safe behavior.
If you are single, you will want to be very conscious of all of the details that you want to find manifested in a potential partner. For you to truly find lasting fulfillment in a relationship, you will first want to make a list of all of the things that you value the most in a person, whom you would want to choose to be your beloved.
Then you have to be very vigilante about taking the time that it takes to become intimate with a new person that you meet and consider dating. It takes time to get to know a person's abilities, values, and beliefs. Before you make a definitive choice to get more involved and give more to a relationship, you will want to be sure that you are certain that you know a lot about the person you are attracted to before choosing a long term commitment with them.
Of course this will require you to know a good deal about yourself too. That is why it is always desirable to continue to educate yourself more and more about healing ways that will empower you and thus your life. Sometimes what happens is that one person grows faster than their partner. When the rift grows too wide, the relationship either changes or ends.
Red Tantra teachings focus on sensuality and sexual love making techniques for lovers. These teachings are just one aspect of learning how to be a better lover and how to give and receive more pleasure together. If you are in a relationship, then you will want to learn as much as you can about how to stay present with loving feelings and how to communicate in loving ways with each other.
Some of the love making techniques, actually stimulate healing situations that can create unexpected changes in a couple's relationship. It is important to feel a deep sense of trust in the divine order of the events that occur in your life, even when the pictured horizon appears to be far away.
We are all here practicing and learning how to be better people and better lovers. We will only take a step forward when we are ready to. We need all of the patience we can muster up to receive each change with awareness and acceptance of our choices.
Copyright 01-12-2001, Deborah Joan Carroll.
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Tantra - The Union of Heaven and Earth
Feeling True Love and True Wisdom is Bliss
The Universe that we live in is based on love and pleasure first and foremost. Thus anything that exists in your life, only exists because of love and receiving pleasure. Every choice that you make, in each moment that you live, will determine the quality of your life. Thus if the quality of your life is lacking in some way, it is because you derive pleasure from the circumstances on some level. Otherwise you would make the necessary choices to manifest positive changes in your life. Only you can take responsibility for where you find yourself.
This is a hard reality to face for those who feel like a victim of life's circumstances. The way to get beyond the deficient circumstances is to start making new choices that will lead you towards creating the life that you want. To do this, it is important to seek and find healing information that really gives results. Whatever you want to create in your life can be accomplished once you find the best knowledge to satisfy your particular needs. Without education, you will not be able to put certain plans into action successfully.
Once you know the best way to create the life of your dreams, you will also want to know how to communicate your desires to others. Every day we have many opportunities to communicate to others how we feel, and what we intend to create, to better our lives. It is important to have the ability to be very conscious of what we want to communicate to others, and also to use this ability for good.
It is good to share our heart-felt intentions with people who are able to be equally aware, and consciously caring about us. We can not relate to each other without the ability to communicate what is in our hearts, and our minds.
As we practice being in our truth and sharing our ideas and feelings with the world, we start to fine-tune what is really true and what is fraudulent. The love that we seek must start with the ability to be honest. If we can not find honesty, then we can not be real. Because love is a feeling, it is vital that we allow ourselves to feel our feelings. If we are not able to find safe ways to feel every feeling that we have, then we will find ourselves adopting the habit of shutting down from feeling them. We also need to be able to share these feelings with other people in our lives. If we keep our inner world in isolation, then we begin to create a mask that will keep us separate from our outer world.
In Tantra teachings, it is a basic truth that each human being is connected as "One Being" in a place of heart, and love. This place that connects us all is a central channel that each one of us has, and is able to access within ourselves. To connect to the place of love that exists for all of us, we have to be able to know that each one of us is essentially the same. Of course different people are in different stages of development on their own individual, and unique path of life. Yet every person does have the ability to reach advanced states of healing, if they are willing to learn how to make healing occur for themselves and others.
No one really wants to be alone or reject others. On some level, even if it is unconscious for some people, the desire to know union exists. Every human has the desire to feel received by another and to feel cared for. Every human being has the ability to feel his or her own spirit and want to share it with another.
To experience how to discern what is really true within all of the communication that we experience, requires a fair bit of training, because the mind is very complex. This discernment comes when we have the ability to feel what is true.
To know a truth, you have to be able to feel it authentically. Essentially this just means that you are feeling in reality, and not just thinking that you are feeling.
When true feelings are felt, divine wisdom arises in the present moment.
This allows a person to be aware of something that had previously eluded them.
The more a person can be honest with themselves and others, the easier it is to connect with divine wisdom. We all have habits and patterns that exist from childhood, and previous incarnations that affect our human personality. We are all connected to divine love, and we can feel and know the wisdom and bliss of divine love, if we allow ourselves to connect with it. To do this requires that we become comfortable with our humanness, and this especially includes our human feelings, on all levels of all of our human feelings.
Our love is always present, yet our judgment of certain feelings as being wrong or bad keeps us in separation from our love. True love is unconditional, and thus, judging something as right or wrong is creating an agenda to keep things separate. If we see our behavior as the result of a choice, rather than being good or bad, we can begin to find the union of dark and light. The dark is love that has not been received as love. Since universal law dictates that love is the ruling factor in our world, then this includes even the dark aspects that are often rejected and judged as being evil or sinful. Actually, evil is when we choose not to feel. When we choose not to feel, we are rejecting love, because love is a feeling, and includes all authentic human feelings. We often choose not to feel because we are afraid of the judgment from other people, when we do feel.
In actuality, the more we can feel and receive all of our human feelings as love, the more we actually heal our whole being. And when other people are with us in the same room, and we are all really feeling authentically, we can feel the density of our love within the space that we are sitting in together in that room. One definition of Tantra, is to bring spirit into matter. Thus to feel any feeling authentically actually allows us to feel love, if we can let go of our judgment of the feeling. When we let go of the judgment, we can slow down and receive the feelings within our bodies, and get out of our habit of staying up in our heads. The more we feel authentically, the denser our body will feel, as our love descends more into our physical body, and into the density of physical matter.
When this happens, we are actually experiencing a line up of our feeling body with the rest of our body. This practice essentially connects heaven with earth.
To actually understand this to be true, you have to have an experience of it for yourself. Also you have to have a practiced person help to guide you as you begin to slow down, and let your feelings be felt and shared. Many different things are true, yet there are subtle differences as to what is authentic and what is not.
The results of learning these awareness techniques are definitely some of the most rewarding lessons you will ever have the opportunity to learn. The ability to feel and receive your love and share it with others, owning all of who and what you are, is a huge gift to yourself and others who are also open to it.
We are human beings living a human life, and we are also divine beings that are often choosing to be separate from human consciousness. The more we feel and know the truth of our divinity along with our humanness, the more we can choose to practice sharing more of our love and more of what is in our hearts to share.
When we know that we are everything and nothing, and when we feel that we can be anything that supports the evolution of our souls, we will choose to trust in the divine plan, and choose to follow our hearts. We can choose to learn a lineage of knowledge that will show us a transparent awareness of what is really true about our lives, and the lives of every other human being on the planet.
If you find yourself stumbling around in the dark, ask yourself why you are choosing to keep the dark separate from your heart. The judgment of what is dark may only serve to keep your heart closed to what you really want to share with your world. If you would choose to share how you really feel, and know if you are being received by the person you are communicating to, you would have to look at all aspects of yourself and your world. You would then have to look at all of your choices, and find the ones that allow you to feel your love the most. If you are suppressing your feelings to be nice, you may just be afraid of love. Only by feeling our love, do we in fact lose control. To have control over something is a dark aspect of life. You can not lose control of control. Thus it is losing control of love that we are most afraid of. We are not afraid of being in control, we are afraid of not being in control. It can feel very scary at times to let go of control and surrender into feeling, and sharing our love with other people.
Yet to surrender into love, and be loving, by giving and receiving love, is a chance to feel more joy for all of life and for all that we are. The more we feel all that is ready to be felt within ourselves, the more we learn how to receive more of our love. The more we can choose to feel more often, the more often we will feel the feeling of love within ourselves. The more we feel our love, the more we want to share our love with others, and the more we want to receive love from others. The more practice we have with all of our feelings, the easier it feels to be alive as a feeling human being. The more alive we feel, the more we feel our enthusiasm for life. When we surrender to love, we trust in divinity more, and we allow things to flow in and out of our lives more easily. We allow love to change us, and we trust that who we are becoming is a magnificent expression of love!
To do this requires that we let go of our attachment to our identity, or our story.
We have to let the frail ego die. We have to confess what we truly feel even if it includes feelings that are considered to be bad or unjust. When we feel, it is possible to feel any kind of feeling. Our habit is to not feel because we are afraid of the undesirable feelings. When we truly lose our attachment to having an identity that is based on the judgment of what we feel, we can relax into love even more. Love exists in all true feelings, even if the feelings are of cruelty and hate. It is when someone acts "without feeling" how their actions will affect the feelings of another person, that they are not able to be honest about their hidden motives to be cruel or hurt someone. In a situation like this, the dark aspects of love are manifesting as a separation. For the person who acted cruel, it is indeed a challenge to admit that on some level they did receive pleasure from their cruel actions. Yet confessing this truth allows for the person to heal the separation that would exist in believing a lie, or also known as denial. Remember, the acronym for denial is: "DON'T EVEN KNOW I AM LYING". To feel a union with the divine, we have to feel authentically. Thus an honest feeling shared without an agenda or ulterior motive, is an act of love. Even if other people present in the midst of your shared authentic feeling, judge it as not being loving.
The human race has been conditioned to not feel for such a long time now, that most people have a habit of not sharing how they are truly feeling. An inner critic prevents most people from sharing the things that they really think about, and feel about. A part of us IS "very conscious" of what we are feeling, and what we are not sharing with others. This is the part of us that knows what is really true for us. We have to take time to really get to know what is going on within ourselves. The paradox is that we love to love, and we hate to hate. Yet it is also true that we hate to love, and we love to hate. A myriad of feelings and combinations of feelings exist within us to be felt. Thus we obviously experience mixed feelings!
Because of these polarized feelings, and aspects of life that exist here on earth, we will experience ALL of the many different qualities of love. To split the duality of this life, and be free of the paradox, we have to rage for our love! In doing this we are also raging for our vitality, and raging for our divinity. We do this to continue to choose love in as many of our moments as we possibly can. For anger, is the feeling that we must feel authentically to be able to empower ourselves, to make the choices that are really in alignment with our truth. It takes great courage to be a consciously loving, and authentically feeling human being.
Imagine a world where every choice to FEEL leads you to a place where you can feel more connected to life, and where you can experience more compassion for yourself and others. It is one thing to think about these ideas as concepts, and understand them, and it is another thing to feel a true feeling of compassion that permeates throughout your whole being. To have a real experience of feeling divine love on a deep level, within your own physical body, that you can feel deep inside of your very bones, is a beautiful validation of the fact that divinity does exist here on earth, as it exists in heaven.
For it is our basic human feelings that once felt authentically, allows us to feel our love, be it human, and/or divine. No matter what circumstances are prevalent, love and pleasure are always the main determining factors. If you can believe in this truth, you can use it as a way to determine which choices you have, or haven't made, that keep you from realizing your truth. It is your truth that will center you, to create a life that is full of the things that you dream about manifesting, and that is in alignment with your highest good, and your soul's evolution.
work in progress;
copyright, 01/12/2001, Deborah Joan Carroll
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Healing with Love and Pleasure
Despite the fact that Love is a feeling, we have in many ways been socialized into accepting ideas of Love as a picture that we believe in. Human contact is vital, and yet true human intimacy does need some time to develop between people to be authentic.
We can attempt to pretend that simple discretionary membranes do not exist, although every human being has natural boundaries that are necessary. If we fake how we really feel then our heart closes. We have to know when we are one hundred percent honest, not faking anything. We have to feel true enthusiasm and share our truth from our open heart.
There are many levels of consciousness that make up each human being, in which aspects of divinity exists. There are polarized aspects of consciousness that include both positive and negative currents. Love embraces both positive and negative currents as being one current. Each one of us has free will to choose which current we want to focus on. The tricky part of enlightenment is that most of the time we experience our world from outside of our body, from a mental perspective, or from a higher view of consciousness that exists as our light body.
Many meditative states give people an illusion of bliss. A separation exists that keeps people from being fully conscious within their physical body. For example, a person can feel a pleasurable orgasm as a result of fantasizing about a sexual encounter, yet the mere fact that this encounter is imagined and not a real experience, the bliss felt in the body from their orgasm is actually static and will not expand their consciousness. True bliss is felt within our bodies when true love, compassion, and wisdom manifests physically within our body. This accomplishment can take a good part of a lifetime to actualize.
True love is unconditional. This means that there is no judgment that says something is bad or wrong. Any feeling that we feel is love, including grief, fear, anger, pain, and joy. It is easy to say that joy is love, yet it is a challenge to feel that our pain or anger could also be love. There are many reasons why we choose to shut down our feelings, and stay in our head analyzing and judging. Love demands that we feel safe. Therefore there are many habitual defenses that keep us from fully loving our selves and others.
Many people are interested in learning about Tantra and in experiencing more full body orgasms and more intensified and prolonged orgasms. Pleasure is a vital aspect of healing and feeling love. We have definite ideas about what is pleasurable and what is not pleasurable. Most of the information that is shared about Tantra and the love making techniques of the Kama Sutra, is shared from the cosmology of sexual energy being the main factor to ascertain.
Energy is only one aspect of our physical experience. It is possible to experience pleasure energetically and not be able to integrate any of it in a way that sustains a deeper capacity for love. Feelings that manifest real healing in the body, are often overlooked and habitually dispersed and discharged into the body's energy field, with out being received as a permanent blessing.
To fully develop our capacity to heal sexually, love must come first. In an energy-based paradigm, true healing and blessings of love can be wasted and overlooked. A negative karmic residue can also be created that the person is completely unconscious of, and yet they can "think" that they hold the key to enlightenment. The unloved aspects of life must be received with love. Thus whatever we judge as "not being love", must be felt and received with love to be liberated.
For the mind to be healed, it has to merge with our heart. It takes years of practicing healing methods, before this can really happen for any duration. Our central channel must open to allow portions of our light body to descend into union with our physical body. This experience happens when any feeling is fully felt and received with love. To experience feeling true joy, all of our human feelings must be felt. Without actually feeling our grief, fear, anger, and pain, our ability to feel joy is limited or faked.
Loving our human-ness on all levels is a vital part of authentic healing. There are many important issues about being human that require healing. Conscious loving addresses them all. The sexual teachings are supposed to be taught once a basic foundational awareness is first learned. Ninety percent of Tantra awareness does not include the sexual practices. To jump into learning the sexual practices without first grasping the basics is like giving a kindergarten student a final exam for their college degree.
Yet sexuality is very desirable. Feeling the pleasure of orgasm in the body is very healing. Feeling the pleasure of joy is much easier to feel and receive in our body, than feeling the pleasure of anger. Yet to fully master Tantra practices, a person has to be able to rage. Rage is the joy of anger. There exists a healthy rage that empowers us to be more loving and intimate. Our conscious awareness increases as we feel our feelings and receive them with love by staying present and slowing down inside. Compassion and wisdom manifests within our being, the more we consciously choose loving intentions.
This discipline includes choosing love even when we feel ignorant, hateful, arrogant, desirous, or jealous. Each one of these elements of feelings can mix with our basic feelings of grief, fear, anger, pain, and joy. Any time that we connect with another person intimately, in a physical way, all of our feelings as well as the elements of feelings, that I just mentioned, are involved. Even if a person wants to forget about their feelings and pretend that they are impervious to such emotions, these elements are present, with a variety of feelings included. If we live in our heads with ideas and pictures of reality, we can be unconscious of how our actions affect other people.
Many people do not know how to deal with their stress, and unconsciously dump their unfelt feelings into their lover's body when they make love. The people who are taking on these unfelt feelings are not conscious of what is happening, and in time, they will sense that they don't want to make love with certain people anymore. In conscious sexual practices, people can be very aware of what is happening when they are making love with another person. They can tell if the person is sucking the life essence out of them, or dumping unloved feelings into them, or psychically jumping into their body to have sex with them with out their permission.
It is important to know before you open up to someone sexually, if you really feel 100% open to receive this person with love. When you chose to be open to them, you can then be conscious of whether or not you are feeling their unfelt feelings, or if you are feeling your own feelings. When two people are in the same room together, if one person drops into feeling their feelings, the other person can feel what the other person is feeling if they are open to their own feelings. Through consistent practice of feeling our feelings, we become much more consciousness of what is happening with other people. A person who is not practiced at feeling their feelings deeply and continuously, and receiving them with love, will not be as conscious of some of the subtleties that a practiced person is aware of.
In many ways, the partners that we mate with are mirrors of ourselves. They match us in ways that are healing to each other. As we journey through life and share intimately in a variety of relationships, we can learn how to share more honestly with our friends and lovers. In practicing sexual techniques that identify if we are feeling authentically, and what we are feeling, we can connect more with our higher self and feel more whole and complete within ourselves. Then our choice to merge physically with another person is based on a natural passion, rather than neediness. If people do not take the time to learn with great clarity why they choose to connect with other people physically, then they could stay trapped into habits of having sex for titillating results or to play a seductive game. True love cannot be manipulated, and conscious sex demands that love be present authentically, with out any hidden agendas or masks.
True pleasure is experienced when our hearts are liberated with feelings of joy, which includes the joy of any feeling. The "joy of fear", is excitement. How much excitement can you contain feeling in your body without separating your spirit outside of yourself? Our fear of fear (our terror) keeps us from delving into many pleasurable experiences. Many people are still frightened by thoughts of being rejected, or embarrassed. We scare ourselves with ideas of being reactively angry or feeling painfully desolated. Until we can be vulnerably naked with another person, we cannot even begin to practice authentic love making techniques.
A space of love and safety must be present before a person can receive a healing from having their g-spot touched and massaged. A man wants to feel a heart connection with himself and then with his lover, before he begins to feel arousal in his penis and regulate his seminal fluids to maintain his erection. To heal with love and pleasure, many things have to exist. There has to be honesty. There has to be open-ness, and trust. These things take time to discern in relationships. Many people break their trust and do not repair it. Love wants to expose everything. Even so called negative things can be shared and received with love. In doing this kind of confessing, deeper understanding and conscious feeling of what is behind the acting out comes forth. What was unconscious becomes conscious.
If a person desires true enthusiasm, they have to be able to choose to love the aspects of themselves that they normally criticize and judge as being wrong. This is how love wants to play. Love wants to integrate the dark and the light and love it all. To further compound the intensity of all of this, as we feel and receive our world with love, what is unconscious becomes conscious. This is a natural occurrence that can bring past memories to the present moment, including memories from previous incarnations. To experience the depth of the matrix of life, can be terrifying, and to prevent this experience from happening, people choose not to feel. From an early age, our parents teach us to settle down and behave. Our natural feeling connection to our body is often held back by a fear of punishment, even into our adult years.
Feelings are threatening to many people, yet we all need to feel them in a safe loving place where we can experience once again being reconnected to our bodies. Of course, grabbing someone and having a passionate love making session can be very fulfilling. Sure this pleasure can be an oasis in an otherwise dry calendar of events. Yet if our habit of feeling pleasure authentically is lost and we act out unconsciously, we create even more problems for ourselves. We have to know ourselves fully. We have to know what we stand for. We have to choose to take risks to share more love and this requires honesty. The more we can admit our feelings and our habits of preventing ourselves from feeling, the better off we are. The air is clear to be real. Our hearts are full with feeling.
When we can feel in a way that truly integrates our feelings into our body, we are less likely to harm another person. Once we are really in touch with ourselves, we won't do something that we know would harm another person. One aspect of allowing ourselves to feel is sharing how we feel, and not keeping our feelings hidden or secret. It is safer to look stupid or be embarrassed, than it is to hide our human-ness. Of course we have a self-image that we feel we need to maintain to be loved, yet in reality love says that no image is necessary. Honesty and humility heals us.
We receive a large amount of pleasure from life when we chose to see our world as an extension of ourselves. We are all in this together. We are all affecting each other. If we are not conscious of how we affect others, then we can at least know that unconsciously we are affecting everything, since each one of us is a part of the whole. The whole universe lives within each one of our hearts. It is within our human heart that the love of this world can and does manifest. Feeling is the beginning. Feeling joyous joy and excitement is the beginning to feeling more love in our pelvis area. Every feeling and element of feeling exists within us though, and the dark and the light continually expand and integrate as we pulse through life. There is a whole lot more going on inside of us, than just energy.
When it comes to sexuality, choose love first, always. If you are in a committed relationship, be honest or else you are not giving your partner the right they deserve to be given, to choose how they feel about your commitment. Secret love affairs and making love while fantasizing about another person, is an act of cruelty. This choice to be secret is a lack of courage to be real. If you cannot be honest, you are creating a karmic residue for everyone involved. Secrets will impede the opening of your central channel and your connection with your higher self. If you make a mistake, and make amends as an adult, you can make a vow to choose to be more discerning and sincere from that moment forward. It is a sign of maturity when you can give your word and keep it.
If you continue to make the same mistake then there is something that you have to look at within yourself. Mistakes are blessings if we can choose to learn from them, and not stay stuck feeling guilty about them. Confess, and move forward. If your partner is able to love your humanness, and has the ability to choose compassion and understanding, then your past cruel choice can possibly be liberated, if you are sincere about your new choice to be honest. Realistically though, a person is being masochistic if they continue to stay involved with someone who is acting cruelly towards them. Kindness to ourselves and to others must be actualized for true compassion to exist.
There is real pleasure in love, yet many people do not know how to discern true love or true pleasure. There is a way to feel and receive your blessings, and contain them. This requires that you do in fact feel "in" your body. If you believe that energy can heal then you have to know that your healing is most likely happening a bit outside of your body, and then it is not a solid healing; and it is not long lasting, or integrated. Unless of course you are feeling and receiving your feelings at the same time; then your energy will be merged within your central channel and you will feel incredible vitality. Love is the determining factor. Energy will only merge once feelings of love are felt and received, which means any feeling that is fully felt and received with love.
When we are only focusing on energy (as our cosmology), there are some subtle shifts that affect our perceptions, and perhaps this is as safe a stride as a person can allow for themselves in the moment. Yet many times when people experience energy work, real excitement is being suppressed and a mental perspective is maintaining a resistance to accessing their more powerful feelings. Part of this experience of separateness from our feelings is from having our eyes closed and allowing ourselves to drift further away from our presence into a trance state. Our habit is to leave our physical presence when we relax. Therefore an inward focus on how we feel inside of our body, allows us to be more connected with our conscious presence, and with what feelings are coming up to be felt.
Compassion manifests once all of the feelings and elements of feelings have been felt and received with love. Then with compassion, consciousness develops further until our true wisdom begins to merge within our body. When this happens, the mind no longer exists. Our concepts and beliefs are annihilated. Our whole being has truly surrendered to something greater than ourselves. When this occurs then the ability to begin experiencing wisdom sex is possible. If this sounds like something that you would want to be able to experience, then of course you have to begin in kindergarten so to speak. Since there are many things that have to be healed before your wisdom body can immerge within you.
This is the path we were meant to experience. Of course it won't be easy. Of course we were not supposed to figure it all out in just a few lifetimes. There is great excitement for each new life that we live. We have already died many times, and we are still alive! The more we learn how to contain our blessings in our body, the more our capacity of psychic awareness develops. We continue to develop a deep relationship with our higher self and with creation. Habits of living in the past and being attached to any past wounds eventually heal. Our presence continues to claim each moment as a blessing! We continue to risk sharing more love, and trusting in our feelings of what we know is our truth. When we slow down inside to really feel and receive our feelings as love, our Divine wisdom drops into our heart, and we truly experience the blessings of our spirit, of our human heart, and of our human life.
Copyright, Deborah Joan Carroll, November, 2002.
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